I hate it when words are hard to utter, sentence are hard to form, and you start to stutter.
Em, Ah, Har, Er, Oh. So, i just shut up.
Being thrown questions that i have no answers to, answering past event that i have no recollection whatsoever, it became more like an investigation. I like role playing, but this type i don't fancy. It was one of the toughest hours in my life, so far.
It made me realised eventhough psychology was my main tertiary education, its not my passion in life to be a counsellor yet. Of course, theres more to it than just counselling but i highly doubt that it would be my field. but who knows.
The tough hours swept past, a sigh of relief. Too soon, it was yet to be over. Not even a tiny wee bit close. As the thought of closure was sweet, it humped again and again, the ending? i see not.
Ignorance is bliss. I would love it if it really is. In reality, ignorance can cause life or death situations, i dread. Guilt is a heavy baggage to carry around through life, cannot and will not live with it. Especially when responsibilities are assumed to bear.
Sounds morbid eh, i know. Morbidity lurks around this missy all week. I too anticipate the change of 'chi'. Probably when i die.
pic by fotoheart
A friend asked me whether i would pose nude. Take picture of my nude self today.
Its rather a queer question coming from a friend i knew since high school.
Anyway, i case you don't know how i would answer... AH NO!!!!
Other than having body conscious issues, taking picture of it would be rather scary isn't it.
I mean, if you want to take nude pictures of oneself, of cos la kena got self confidence and of cos a good body to show off also la. Besides, i'm not a fan of nudity.
And the story went like this, her friend asked her whether i take nude pictures or not cause he saw pictures that was supposedly to be me. He claims that that internet circulating mail which attached with a girl shooting nude pictures of herself is me.
Its as if i don't have enough issues in my mind already. But, nude pictures of me? ahpooootui...
This guy has seen me for about 4 times tops throughout his life. I wonder how sure he is.
So, to a shoutout of you guys who get lotsa porn in your mailbox. If you flick to one who looks like me, oh please send it to me.
Sigh. Like theres not enough issues already.
Hardly do i take time to go watch a movie or read a book. Mind you, book has always been my place of solace. To the suprise of many, i look more of a drinking kaki than a quiet individual that would sip her chai tea and read. Movies? i don't love em, i don't hate em either. A good one? anytime.
Times of leisure, i now would rather nap it away. You would understand when you see the dark circle underneath my already panda eyes. Hail to concealers, they are life savers.
It was a rare occasion. Without an ipod, with four hours on my hands which two i used it to nap, i opened a gift a friend has generously given me. As i turned the first page, i couldn't stop. I kept flipping it till i reached home. It was the memoirs of a gangster's daughter, a life of a kakuza by Shodo Tendo. In the beggining, the book seemed too easy to read. It felt like short stories of Amy Tan's, but yet using very simple descriptive english. It suprised me a little, but i read it from cover to cover. Shodo Tendo's experience of life was written by herself, a daughter of a kakuza. At the end, she too admits the book does not suck you into character, she tries, she hopes one day she could with her writings. It wasn't about the language anymore, it was her genuinity, her honestly and her life experience in Japan that made it all the more pure and true.
At times, i would think of writing too. I bet my writings will be a laughing tool to many. Other than the misuse of grammar everywhere, it would be funny. Teachers would buy it as a tool of no-no.
My life is definately not as yo-yo fied as Shoko. I wonder how would a memoirs of teohmaymay would be like... its probably some silly stories. Now, it makes me wanna laugh thinking about it.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. At first, i didn't know where i was heading to, what i was watching, what time was the show. I didn't regret it, it was the first show for quite a while now, i strongly suggest you watch it. Other than focusing just on Brad himself which you definately would with his charming youthful looks, the storyline blew me away. Blow you? i no know. Go see!
Now, i'm excited to go watch movies and get myself some books to drown into.
My second home
Surrounded by filth on a meal does not mean a thing here, as long as the food taste good.
Best, family. End of the holidays, back to work. Sigh.
